Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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