used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Operation Purity has been aborted
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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