Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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