He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
