I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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