I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
