she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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