one might say we're banned from that church
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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