Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Success! We fucked roommates!