Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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