Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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