even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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