He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize