i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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