Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize