marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
