whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
