He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
