before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
