Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
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