He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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