He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize