Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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