Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
