I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
