How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
