Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
