theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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