whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize