hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My feet surprised me
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