I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
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He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
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It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today