okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
