return my video game
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
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Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
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if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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