Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
