Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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