My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Boobs speak an international language.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
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