Pappa wants mamma naked
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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