atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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