and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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