i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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