Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
