Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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