my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
