question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
