I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
