Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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