Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Is Oprah even human
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
