So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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