Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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