Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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