Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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