you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
